Hauls gas. Every time I bring it up the excuse is that I'm "controlling and overstepping privacy boundaries. I have been gathering a lot of information so I can confront him with lots of evidence and walk out on our marriage. Let me also say that my boyfriend is an alcoholic ad well.
So, why am I trying so hard? I feel like I am on the edge of a nervous breakdown and it scares the hell out of me because of the thoughts I am having. I don't know what to do about it anymore. I don't really have anyone I can talk to about it. All I have is him and he doesn't want to hear it anymore. Please help me if you can. I need some answers on what I should do or what I should try. I'm really glad you wrote. It shows that you have not given up hope in your marriage and that's a good sign for a promising future together.
If that is what you husband addicted to chat rooms in your heart of hearts, there is every reason to believe you can and will achieve it. A renewed love between the two of you can be yours if that's what you both want it. It sure sounds like that's what you want. Your marital record so far looks good, after all. You write that you were together as a couple for eight years before you married. Those years must have taught you a lot about one another and knowing what you did about each other you wanted to spend the rest of your lives together as a married couple.
You've come to a temporary slump in your marriage now. You are right to want to get back on track immediately and proceed to reap the benefits of a happily married couple in sync with one another again.
In the end, your relationship will have been strengthened because of the crisis the two of you faced and overcame together. Let me address the details of your letter. When you call your husband "obsessed", do you mean like a hopeless gambler that is ready to throw away his life's savings for the sake of his addiction or do you mean like someone who is mad about a passing fancy?
If the latter, do you think this is a temporary fascination that will wear off when he realizes how seriously threatening his flirtations are becoming to your marriage? If the former, don't you think you'd better seek some professional counseling right now before it's too late! Cyber romance is surely alluring, mystical, bewitching and seductive.
You are right to be alarmed. You write that you wanted the same things for your marriage at the start. Did that mean monogamy, faithfulness and fidelity? If not, you need to review that initial understanding between you and reevaluate the meaning of your marriage. If so, you both need to recommit to that original reason you are together: your love of one another!
That your intimacy husband addicted to chat rooms been compromised because of this extramarital distraction reinforces the seriousness of the husband addicted to chat rooms and cries out to you both to "get it together" again and soon. The good adult women is, of course, that your husband tells you he loves you. But what does he mean by these precious words?
Loosing trust in one another is a sure sign that the fortress of your love is being bombarded and besieged. Take care to nurture the love between you with tenderness and good will, compromise, acceptance, and an unconditional kind of love that will see you through every crisis and challenge, disagreement and misunderstanding. Some of them really do want to change each case being different to the other but believe me any addiction depends on the addict and the support of the of their partner.
If your addict partner doesnt want to give it up then they probably never will. If they declare undying love for you and fill you with many promises, be sceptical but trust your initiative. If you feel like it is not right for you then it is not right for you. We can get through this…. Hopefully dating men in their. Please, just stay away from him.
No contact. Block him, change your number. He is toxic. The bad is really, really bad and will destroy your soul in time. Wow oh wow. I did think I was alone in this horrible nightmare! Not only that, but conversation that would lead anyone to believe there is more to their involvement than just picture swapping, which is bad enough!
What kind of men are these? Do I turn my back after 6 years w him? That txt was meant for someone else because it was not in corrilation w our conversation. What a shock to see what this world is coming to. Advise for me anyone? And since moving to Australia he is one two dating sites and texting lots husband addicted to chat rooms women I have found them all messages through his phone.
How do I approach the subject if what I know. He has lots of women before and after we married. Linda-What a strong woman you are. I was also just reading the post about the woman whose h has a fetish for bbw.
Sometimes getting out is not as easy as it would appear. They will promise change and pray they will never hurt us again. I am one of those women who fell into that trap. I am a Psychiatric Nurse and should have known better. I will say, however, I had never been exposed to sex addiction, so was pretty clueless as to what to expect. My h was into bbw porn, fantasizing, and mb. The story is a long one, but he sought counseling, and from the appearance of it all he was working diligently toward recovery.
He supposedly gave up the porn, but then his addiction continued with objectifying young husband addicted to chat rooms with big breasts. I went through two separations from him and now finally the last. The lieing and deceiving continued.
He beat a lie detector test, which he later admitted. That gave me false hope that his addictive behavior had stopped, otherwise I would not have married him. I have dealt with a lot of psychiatric problems in my career, but never have I seen a man who could lie and cover up as well as husband addicted to chat rooms SA-He is the best I have ever seen.
I honestly think if I had not had experience in the field of deception and knew what to look for, I would still continue to be fooled. My sister, who is also an R. But, then Husband addicted to chat rooms have to accept responsibility for getting hooked into change once I found out about the continued deception.
I am a caretaker, and it was meeting a need for me. I honestly believed I could get him help and change him. How stupid can a woman be!! It is amazing how we deceive ourselves, as well. But my point being that it is so easy to be fooled by a man who has spent his entire lifetime leading a secret life.
But, at the same time, we have to be realistic and understand the dynamics of sex addiction-Change is not in the vocabulary for them.
I enjoyed your post and am always hopeful that other women will do as you have done-get out! You are a wonderful example for us all.
Hugs to you, Sharron. I think women should be strong on their own, they need us for support mostly but they still do what they want, we need to think of ourselves, I know I had nothing to do with his addiction, I have no issues on my own. I know I am strong and this is not my problem, I feel bad for the married women who find out yrs later as your heart is given to him and he doesnt really dating sites couples free like you do.
Its sad how this is a big epidemic. I want to emphasize- ladies you are not responsible and you are not the one who made him that way, you are strong and can make it without all the pain they bring. Save yourself and find a life with out their issues. Dont think you deserve any of this. Turning a blind eye is not an answer either, always believe your gut and pray for yourself — do not believe them. I think addictions like this are dangerous and I am not sure they really recover. I have to. Marie- I am so sorry for what you are going through-your husband is the classic sex addict.
What you really should be asking is how to get out and when to leave. Do I think your marriage has a chance of surviving?? NO and a big NO!! One of the classic symptoms of an SA is projecting the blame onto the spouse. Listen to me when I tell you that you have had absolutely nothing to do with his behavior.
He is very sick. Even though you think he is being honest with you, I guarantee you only know a tip of the iceberg. Your marriage puts demands on him that he does not want and he cannot fulfill- You are asking for a husband who loves you, is able show intimacy with you, and puts you on that pedestal you deserve to be on.
He has none of these characteristics. Even if he was motivated to change, it would take years to see that happen. Your h is not the one who should be making the rules, you are! He not only is a sex addict, but a self-centered scum bag. He and has no respect for women. If you stay with him, your life will be a living hell. You deserve a REAL man. Your h is an abuser in the true sense of the word. Please get some counseling for yourself. If you are even entertaining the idea of staying with him, you not only need help in dealing with the trauma he is causing you,but also why you would even want him.
Your marriage could not be more dysfunctional, husband addicted to chat rooms. I hope you know this is all said in love. Our husband addicted to chat rooms site, S. S Sisterhood of support is a closed site, so everything you say is confidential.
You can join for a minimal amount per month. The women there are wonderful. You will also learn everything there is to know about sex addiction. I suggest you look into it. Much love to you, and good luck Sharron. I am so, so sorry, but your husband is totally FOS.
What is Cybersexual Addiction?
However, he feels no compunction over placing the blame on you, for his illness. Its really, really bad. His way or the hi-way! Studies have been done which prove this.
The circumstantial evidence that you have is more than enough to put him away. But that was all an act. This is the real him. With Love, Holly. My husband and I have a few month old child and we have been together since around He claims he has never met anyone face to face, and I do not have any proof of that, but I do wonder… He said he never made love to anther women than me, even before we got married. I think I believe him but I now have doubts because he has said a few little lies to me.
I do not like being lied to at all and it ruins trust between us. He said that me being suspicious of him and snooping into his email etc. I am not sure what to think about it — could that be true? It husband addicted to chat rooms much worse after our son was born, he actually kissed another girl and he told me about it. He has lots of opportunities — he is a young professor and his female students like him, he travels frequently to attend conferences etc.
This year he even requested 1. It seems he is trying to be honest at least. We are going to counseling every week and it is slightly better for sure. Is there any hope for us? S- It is approximately 11pm good husband addicted to chat rooms Missouri time. Just checking in with you. Hope you are doing better.BEST MATCH DATING SITE
Orlando speed dating events decision s — Obviously your husband is beyond help and does not want it. Take your trauma and run. Usually they want a woman to take care of them while they continue the secret life, and present a reasonable facsimile of a marriage to the outside world.
I may be wrong, but usually the pattern is they will do anything to keep you, and for that very reason. Expect the games to began. If so, he will soon apologize, tell you he will get help, or is a changed man and will never do it again.
I would guess, when he starts thinking clearly, he will want to protect that lovely persona he puts onto everyone and protect his reputation.
You are not verbalizing or seeing any signs from him that he is remorseful. Do you think anyone else knows about this? How is he acting to you right now? He will most likely turn it around and blame you for what he is doing to try and taint your self esteem even more. Did you try and seek out some help today? Do you have any brothers or sisters you can confide in. I know you are hurting beyond repair right now, but this man is ,not worth it, and I think you are beginning to realize it. Even if you choose not to divorce down the line, I would suggest getting away from him for awhile so you can get your head straight and think clearly.
You are just operating on emotions right now, husband addicted to chat rooms. Did you think about joining S. Anything I can say or do to help you right now? He has another phone. I found out n called it. Of course he answered I went off. He said I took away his internet he went elsewhere. I told him get help or I want a divorce. My heart is beyond broken. Let us know if you are okay. JoAnn suggested going to the S. S Sisterhood of Support site. I think that would be a good fit for you as there are many ways to connect with eachother.
It is totally confidential, and only members can read and answer posts. Check in please. Love, Sharron. S-I left JoAnn a message to see if it is okay — she usually answers fairly quickly, so hopefully by tomorrow.
I know you feel helpless, husband addicted to chat rooms remember God helps those who help themselves. This problem is above and beyond anything you can do to help him. I have been married to an SA for 3 years. He is the typical SA who lies, deceives, pretends to work at getting better, but deep down is probably more comfortable with his addiction than without it.
He is still lieing and has huge anger control issues. He is also diagnosed with a Borderline Personality Disorder. I have been foolish enough to go through the denial stage — thinking he will get lived like a single guy, the helping stage-doing everything I could think of to do. I should have known better, but instead I enabled him, supported him, got him the right counselor, attended therapy with him — the whole gamut.
The end result is I separated from him twice, and now am in the process of considering divorce. Unfortunately for all of us married to an SA, this is this is how it usually plays out. Do you want to put yourself through that?
I know you love him very much, and this is devestating, but you are young and deserve someone who can love you in the true sense of the word and treat you with respect and dignity. You husband has no integrity, and as Emily puts it he is liken to a wolf in sheeps clothing.
Please take time to mourn, realize it is what it is, calm down, get some help, and the answer will clearly come to you. Men prefer cybersex because it removes performance anxiety that may be underlying problems with premature ejaculation or impotence and it also hides their physical appearance for men who feel insecure about hair loss, penis size, or weight gain.
If cybersex has impacted a significant relationship, then click on the link to learn more about our exclusive new booklet: Infidelity Online: An Effective Guide for Rebuilding Your Relationship after a Cyberaffair. If you and your marriage have already been hurt by Cybersexual addiction, then read Caught in the Netthe first and only recovery book on Internet addiction to help rebuild your relationship. Click here to order Caught in the Net.
If you need immediate help, please contact our Virtual Clinic to receive email or live chat counseling sessions. For spouses: find out how spouses deal with cyberaffairs. What is Cybersexual Addiction? Medically reviewed by Husband addicted to chat rooms Croft, MD. All Rights Reserved. The Warning Signs of Cybersexual Addiction Understanding what makes Cybersex addictive Treatment for Cybersexual Addiction Warning Signs of Cybersexual Addiction: Routinely spending significant amounts of time in chat rooms and private messaging with the sole purpose of finding cybersex.
For numerous other reasons, there is a very high chance that these "women" are under legal age, and this would be criminal activity, illegal, and very harmful. PLEASE seek help for YOURSELF through a qualified therapist who can help guide you through the process of determining what is best for you, who you deserve in your life, and what you can do to build a happy, nurturing, healthy home for yourself and your children.
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Receive the latest and greatest in women's health and wellness from EmpowHER - for free! Log in Register. By Anonymous November 22, - pm. Print Text Size. Add a Comment 6 Comments. June 3, - pm. Anonymous I am going through a similar situation. February 14, - pm. Anonymous reply to Anonymous I feel your pain. March 26, - am. Anonymous I just found out that my husband of 40 years has been looking husband addicted to chat rooms internet porn for the last two years.
Baffled in Austin April 2, - pm. September 10, - am.FIND FRIENDS FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD
Alison Beaver Hi, I'm sorry you are husband addicted to chat rooms through this, but after reading your initial question regarding your husband and porn addictionand reading the remainder of your story November 22, - pm. Do you really want to post anonymously? Are You a Member? Log In Connect your comment to your member profile.
To move forward, it is important that you continue to talk to your husband and try to understand the extent of his difficulties and what the underlying issues are for him. A second issue for a marriage is that one partner turns to the internet for flirting and sexual excitement rather husband addicted to chat rooms to their partner. When this happens frequently, it can lead to a reduction in their sex-life together, a growing sense of disconnection and an erosion of the marital bond.
Of course your husband should not blame you and he must take responsibility for how he has hurt you with his online behaviour, but the two of you must take responsibility for improving the marriage.STORY TIME: I WAS ADDICTED TO CHATROOMS!
Though husband addicted to chat rooms may be painful, the fact that you have started talking about issues is a good sign. To continue with this process you may wish to seek marriage counselling relationshipsireland.
There is a good chance of success for the two of you, if your husband accepts responsibility for what he has done and if the two of you are willing to work hard on improving your marriage. You can also take action at home to improve your marriage on a daily basis.
For example you can prioritise a daily talking time with your husband when you share how each of you are doing. This should be time you have alone perhaps when the children are in bed and to make sure it is distraction free with the computer and TV turned off. In addition, try to have at least one special evening a week when you get a baby-sitter when you can do some new things together.MEET SINGLE DADS DATING
Simple commitments can make a big difference.